What is a human resource?

Does your organization struggle with the problem of properly fitting people to jobs? Here is a handy hint for ensuring success in job placement. Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and put them in a room with only a table and two…

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M A R T I A L A R T S - Learn Ancient Asian Techniques - Develop Impressive Skills - Learn the Art of Control - Build Self-Confidence - Protect Yourself - Train with exotic Implements - Achieve your Maximum Potential New Class meets Tuesday and…

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An elderly man and his wife go to the doctor so he can get a check up. The doctor examined him thoroughly in the presence of his wife. "You're in perfect health!" said the doctor, "What do you attribute this to?" "It is the help of God." he says,…

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The Stella Awards

It's time again for the annual "Stella Awards"! For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico, where she purchased coffee.…

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  • Mary: Tell me about it! I went golfing with my husband one time, and he told me I asked too many questions!

    Jill: Well, I'm sure you were just trying to understand the game. What questions did you ask?

    Mary: I thought I asked legitimate questions... like, "Why did you hit the ball into that lake?"

  • A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.

    Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence.

    Calling out to the patient, the man says, "Pardon me, sir, but do you have the time?"

    The patient calls back, "One moment!" and throws himself upon the ground, pulling out a short stick as he does. He pushes the stick into the ground, and, pulling out a carpenter's level, assures himself that the stick is vertical.

    With a compass, the patient locates north and with a steel ruler, measures the precise length of the shadow cast by the stick.

    Withdrawing a slide rule from his pocket, the patient calculates rapidly, then swiftly packs up all his tools and turns back to the pedestrian, saying, "It is now precisely 3:29 pm, provided today is August 16th, which I believe it is."

    The man can't help but be impressed by this demonstration, and sets his watch accordingly.

    Before he leaves, he says to the patient, "That was really quite remarkable, but tell me, what do you do on a cloudy day, or at night, when the stick casts no shadow?"

    The patient holds up his wrist and says, "Well, suppose I'd just have to look at my watch."

  • 3 men were waiting outside the labor ward of the hospital. A nurse came out to tell the 1st man: "Congratulations. You are the father of twins." "Twins!" he exclaimed "How about that? I work for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Co.!"

    5 mins later, a nurse came out to tell the 2nd man: "Congratulations. You are the father of triplets." "Triplets!" he said "What a coincidence! I work for the 3M Organization!"

    The 3rd man stood up & muttered: "I need some air. I work for 7-UP!!!!!!! 

  • For her surgery to fuse some vertebrae in her neck, my niece planned ahead. She knew she would have to wear a brace with four steel rods screwed into her skull and attached to a rigid upper-body cast during her recovery, so she brought to the hospital several sweatshirts that were cut to fit over these appliances.

    On her first trip out of her hospital room, she ventured to the cafeteria wearing a shirt bearing the message, "I'd lose my head it is wasn't screwed on."

  • Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation. They get drunk and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night before.

    The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if she has any last words. She says, "I just graduated from Trinity Bible College and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent." They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall to the floor on their knees, beg for forgiveness, and release her.

    The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words. "I just graduated from the Harvard School of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent." They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again they all immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness and release her.

    The last one, a blonde, is strapped in and says, "Well, I'm from the University of Texas and just graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell ya right now, ya'll ain't gonna electrocute nobody if you don't plug this thing in."

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